


The Proper Care and Feeding of Houseplants

by ArielAquarial



Category: Supernatural
Genre: #ProfoundBond Prompt Collection (Supernatural), Alternate Universe, Fluff, Gardens & Gardening, M/M, Meet-Cute, Missouri always knows, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, YouTube, YouTuber Castiel (Supernatural), plant daddy Cas, the plants have taken over
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-14 07:54:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20597318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArielAquarial/pseuds/ArielAquarial
Summary: Cas is a YouTuber who makes videos primarily about plants. Dean is the unwilling recipient of a fern. Despite his mediocre efforts to keep the thing alive, it's only a week before its knocking on death's door. Desperate to save it before his brother finds out, he stumbles onto Cas's youtube channel.





	The Proper Care and Feeding of Houseplants

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my two wonderful betas: Rocksaltandhoney and ms_josephine   
And thank you to: mabscifiromantic and SoloArcana for the help with tags and constructive criticism!

It started with a fern.

Having grown up skipping from apartment to apartment, often sleeping in cars for weeks at a time, Dean thought he would be used to the standard white walls that all apartments seemed to have. That was not the case. As he stood in the middle of his small living room and glanced at the barren walls, he was filled with a sense of emptiness. That emptiness was beginning to turn into the first inklings of loneliness, so he vowed to nip that right in the bud. Dean went to his open box of knickknacks, pulled out a sunset canvas print, and held it up to the wall his couch would soon be shoved up against. It was a start, but the sight of the lone print was a little depressing. He’d need a lot more than one pretty picture to make the two-bedroom apartment feel like a home.

He put his hands to his hips and stared at the furniture he had piled into the middle of the room. A loveseat, side table, coffee table, a bookshelf, and a floor lamp. All in varying shades of dark brown and gray. Boring. Dean didn’t have a clue how to decorate an apartment, and it was showing.

Sam, as usual, had the answer.

“Just get a potted plant or two, Dean. You’re making things too difficult.”

Dean scoffed into the phone. “A plant? What am I, a thirty-year-old lady? Should I get a fuckin’ cat, too?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I have a few plants, and they bring life into the space,” he argued. “No cat needed.”

“Bring life into the space…” he mumbled mockingly.

“You’re such a child,” Sam shot back. “I’m bringing you a plant.”

“No!” he almost yelled. “It's just going to die.”

“It's not going to die,” Sam reassured him. “All you have to do is water it. It’s not that hard.”

“I’ll get plastic plants, then. Remember mom’s raspberry bush? She went on vacation for three days and I killed it. Everything I touch dies.”

“Plastic plants don’t look as good,” he reasoned. “And you know the raspberry bush incident wasn't your fault. There was a gopher infestation.”

“Yes it was,” he grumbled, grasping desperately at his flimsy excuse.

Sam powered on. “Listen, I’m bringing you a plant. I’ll be over in an hour.”

“No, wait—” The call disconnected and Dean’s breath left him in a whoosh.

Staring at his cluttered floor in dismay, he began rearranging his furniture in a rush. The couch got pushed up against the wall, and the TV was placed on the floor directly across from it. He’d mount it eventually, but until then, it would have to do. The bookshelf was slid to the corner and faced the room diagonally, but he knew he’d end up moving it later. The side table and lamp were placed on either side of the love seat, and the coffee table was pushed to the middle of it all. With a bit of pride, he stepped back and looked at what he just accomplished. Not bad, he thought, though it was still plain. Those damn walls weren’t doing him any favors. He went to the kitchen next and tackled the boxes full of appliances.

By the time Sam’s car could be heard pulling up, Dean was a sweaty mess and all of the empty boxes had been placed next to the trash bins where they would be broken down later.

“You smell,” Sam stated in lieu of a hello, using his key and pushing past him with a green bundle in his hands.

“Well fuck you too,” Dean replied. As soon as Sam walked past him, he gave his armpit a little sniff. Shit. He did smell. “I was moving furniture.”

Sam cocked his eyebrows and glanced around. “Is that a euphemism?”

“Not this time.”

Sam gave the room a cursory look. “It’s…interesting.”

Dean advanced on his brother. “Give me the plant and get out.”

Sam thrust the fern at him, putting the plant between himself and his angry brother. “I was joking. It looks great.”

“Whatever. It looks horrible.”

Sam kept his mouth shut and nudged him with the plant.

Dean stared at the tiny leaves and forced back a shudder. That shit looked like it would get everywhere. “Uh. Put it over there. I’ll find somewhere for it later.”

Sam put it on the coffee table as Dean asked. “Ok, make sure you put it somewhere where—”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…” he mumbled, already walking to the kitchen so he could grab them both something to drink. “I got it. It's just a plant. How hard can it be? Now, can you help me mount that TV?”

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

**One week later…**

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

He stroked the tiny leaves with his finger, staring at the limp plant in shock. Dean picked the plant up and peered closer at it. There didn’t seem to be any holes in the leaves, so it couldn’t be bugs, but that was where his plant knowledge ended. He’d watered the thing, made sure it was getting plenty of sun, and even sprayed it with some water every once in a while, but still, it was dying.

Sam was never going to let him live it down.

“It's not that hard,” Dean mumbled to himself, using his best Sammy impression. “It’s just a plant.”

He put the limp plant back on the kitchen counter, nudging it gently towards the window. Maybe it hadn’t been getting enough sun? He crouched down so he was level with the counter and stared at it. The pot was kind of small… maybe it needed a bigger one? Dean closed his eyes and sighed. He had no fucking clue what he was doing. He’d just replace the damn thing next time his brother came around, but with his luck, Sammy would know.

Back on the couch, Dean pulled out his laptop. The fern would live, damnit! He wasn’t going to give Sammy the chance to criticize anything about his life, even his ability to take care of a damn plant. Opening Google, he typed in ‘Fern care’, and hit search.

The first result was a wikiHow article, but he skipped right over that. He didn’t have the time to read, especially if the plant was already on its way to the grave. Scrolling down, he saw the YouTube videos. Jackpot.

He clicked on the first one and crossed his fingers that the lady wouldn’t be a talker. All he needed was someone telling him what he was doing wrong, not some middle-aged woman going on about her weekend before getting down to the nitty-gritty.

The video started out zoomed in on a healthy-looking set of ferns, both in simple ceramic pots. He glanced at his own, still sitting lonely on the counter. At least it wasn’t the pot that was killing it…

“Hello, everyone.” A voice came from the speakers. “My name is Castiel and I’d like to welcome you back to my garden.”

Dean panicked and hit the spacebar hard enough that the coffee table shuddered. His heart was hammering in his chest as he stared at the ferns on screen. That wasn’t the voice of a middle-aged lady. With a shaky hand, he pressed play, pursing his lips as he waited for the man to appear on the screen. After a short pause, the camera zoomed out and a man walked into frame.

“Oh shit.” He tapped the spacebar again and stared. The man looking back at him, paused just as he glanced up at the camera, was the last thing Dean expected. He was broad-shouldered and exactly Dean's type. The table hid everything below his hips, but if his muscular arms and thick trunk were anything to go by, he knew the legs would be strong. The face on him, though, was the cherry on top. Unlike Dean’s own freckled skin, his was clear and tan, making his blue eyes stand out all the better. Subtle crows feet bordered his eyes, and a slight wrinkle marred the skin between his eyebrows. His eyes were hooded, his lips plush, and his jaw was sharp. He was fucking beautiful.

He almost wanted to choose another video. There had to be an old lady with blue-tinted hair somewhere who could give him the tips he needed. He hovered over the trackpad, debating trying google a second time. The video was probably crap, he reasoned, maybe the guy didn’t know what he was talking about. To confirm his theory, he scrolled down to the comment section.

_Gravygirl_

_Thanks for saving my plant!_

The next one was just an eggplant emoji.

_Lizzo2003_

_Come for the grass, stay for the ass._

That one had 14k thumbs up.

_Xferbox_

_You can water my plants any day. Damn_

_Plantlife34_

_Can you do a vid on birds of paradise? Mine won't flower_

_Roodoodle12_

_Give this a thumbs up if you think Gabe should make an appearance!_

There were 8k thumbs up and 203 comments under that one.

Dean scrolled up to the top and sighed. Looks like he did, in fact, help at least one person. With only a bit of trepidation, he pressed play.

Castiel was smiling at the camera, a small ring of light reflecting in his blue eyes. Behind him was an enclosed porch, all blinds up and looking out over a lush backyard full of flowers and bushes and Dean didn’t know what else. It was professional, clearly styled to be a set with proper lighting and a clean layout. With a quick glance down, Dean saw that the guy had 1.3 million subscribers.

This guy was a big deal.

“Today we’re going to be discussing the fern, a simple and easygoing plant—”

Dean snorted in disagreement while the man extolled the virtues of the simple fern. “If it was so easy, mine wouldn’t be dead.”

“—is a Boston fern. This is the most common type to be found in a house.” He gestured to the one that looked exactly like his.

“Boston fern.” He mumbled. If anything, at least he’d be able to google his problem better…

“These beautiful plants flourish in a cool environment with regular misting.”

“Check.” He mumbled.

“Most importantly, ferns need indirect light to keep—”

Dean paused the video and sprinted for his kitchen, cursing the whole way. With a quiet apology to the plant, he moved the fern away from the window and cradled the pot in his hands. “Sorry, little guy. I’ll just move you to…” he glanced around and zeroed in on his side table, “...over here. You can hang out with me.”

Face red with embarrassment, he sat down to finish the video.

“—the fronds from burning. Signs of burnt fronds are browning tips and other discoloration.” Cas paused and the camera zoomed in on the fern perched on the other end of the table. “This fern is a Myers Asparagus fern.”

Dean snorted at the name and opened IFollowTheBees’s channel in another tab, letting the fern video play in the background. Once he got to the video section, he contented himself with browsing. It was impressive, actually. His videos were bringing in views upwards of 1 million each. He had a few with more, one livestream, in particular, seemed to have brought in over 3 million — he added that to his watch later folder for another time. He kept scrolling, opening videos in tabs until he realized he’d opened thirteen of them without noticing.

He opened one titled “Bees and Bats: the basics.” The video started out with the same soft intro music and images. Immediately after the intro, the video cut to an absurdly adorable scene of Castiel cuddling a baby bat. He expanded the video to full screen and leaned back to watch. Castiel’s deep voice poured out of the speakers, talking about conservation efforts and the importance of ‘our pollinators,’ all the while he stared adoringly at the tiny thing. It was the cutest fucking thing he’d ever seen, and he couldn’t keep the smile off of his face.

Dean hit subscribe without a moment’s hesitation.

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

Over the next few weeks, Dean learned that Castiel — or Cas, as he started calling him in his head — put out a large variety of videos. He mostly focused his attention on plants, both potted and garden, and even uploaded a few ‘Cooking with Castiel’ videos where he’d take produce from his gardens and make them into meals even Dean would try, although he’d never tell Sammy. His viewers were his ‘plant children,’ although only Gabe called them that, and Cas was coined the ‘plant daddy.’ The whole plant daddy nickname was new, and Cas obviously wasn’t a fan, but rule number one on the internet was to never let them know when you didn’t like something. Cas had very politely said it was strange and that he would prefer something else, so people had rallied behind the nickname in droves.

His favorite kind of video, though, were the livestreams. These tended to happen before noon on Fridays, so Dean could never catch it live but watching the replays had easily become part of his routine. Gabriel, Cas’ editor, moderated the comments and supplied Cas with alcohol. The results were amazing. Every live chat followed the same routine. Cas would welcome everyone to his channel and thank them for taking time out of their schedules to join him live. After the intro was over Gabe would offer him a drink, to which he begrudgingly accepted, and then after a few questions, he’d offer him another drink which he less grudgingly accepted, and then another which he took without fuss. After that, the game was on.

Gabe took no prisoners and seemed to make it his priority to get Cas to blush. Dean never forgot the time someone had donated fifteen dollars along with the comment “take off your shirt,” which made Cas sputter and Gabe cackle. Like floodgates, more started coming in. If Dean had to hazard a guess, Cas probably brought in close to $300 in donations from thirsty men and women who had money to burn and wanted to give him a hard time. His button-down shirt stayed firmly tucked in the whole night, much to Dean’s amusement and Gabe’s frustration.

His favorite video of Cas’ (and one of the few livestreams he’d been able to catch live) was a drunken rant about bees. It had been a shock to receive a notification from Cas’ channel stating that a live show was going on, especially since it was a Saturday night, and clicked on it immediately. Gone was Gabe the moderator, and in his place was a flushed face Cas, a glass of wine in his hand and a scowl on his face.

Sober-Cas might have mentioned the importance of eating honey and planting milkweed for the butterflies, but drunk-Cas ranted about industrial pesticides and monocropping. It was a completely different side to the normally very polished content, and Dean loved that side of him. He loved a lot of things about Cas, as a matter of fact.

Robbie the fern had been moved to Dean’s bedroom where it enjoyed indirect sunlight and biweekly mistings. Having realized that taking care of a plant really _wasn’t_ that hard, and they really _did_ kind of add a nice touch to the space, Dean picked up another. And another. And another.

Sam let himself into Dean’s apartment one morning, having used his emergency key with the intention of getting Dean up for an early breakfast, and was amazed at the sight before him. Potted plants were everywhere, on the kitchen counter, sandwiching the bookcase, and lining the low table in the entryway where Dean kept his keys. He walked further in a daze, slowly making his way into Dean’s bedroom. Even the bathroom had a little hanging plant next to the mirror.

Dean’s bedroom door was open a crack, so he pushed it the rest of the way and froze. If he hadn’t been able to see Dean, half-naked and sprawled in bed, he would have thought he was in the wrong house. Plants were everywhere…on the dresser, side table, and on the carpet in front of the floor-to-ceiling window.

Blinking, he chanced a second glance around, and all the greenery was still there. No, he wasn’t hallucinating.

“Dean?” he called, keeping his voice low.

Dean grunted and rolled over, but came no closer to waking up.

“Dean,” he said more firmly this time.

He let out a low groan and threw his forearm across his face.

“Dean!”

He shot up, eyes wide and frantic. “Wha?”

Sam scoffed and folded his arms across his chest. “What is all this?”

“What are you doin’ here, Sammy? It's fuckin—” Dean glanced at the clock. “It’s at 8 am.”

“What is all of this?” he asked again, gesturing around the room.

Dean looked around. “All of what?”

“The plants!” he hissed, staring directly at the fern atop his bedside table.

Dean glanced at the plant in question. “Oh, Robbie? What do you mean? You were the one who bought him for me.”

“Robbie? Him?” Sam discreetly pinched himself. There was no way he wasn’t dreaming. “A plant is a male, now?”

Dean frowned at him. “Well, ferns don’t really have a gender, but he presents as a male, so…”

Sam glared at the fern. “Uh-huh. So you named it Robbie.”

Dean just shrugged and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Imma go take a piss.”

Sam’s lip curled in disgust. “I’ll just go make some coffee.”

Dean’s grunt was all the permission he was likely to get.

He wandered back to the kitchen and pulled out Dean’s French press and kettle. While the water was coming to a boil, he examined the nearest plant. He couldn’t even begin to guess what it was, but he knew a healthy plant when he saw one. He moved to the next one and it was in great condition. Sam leaned his hip on the four-seater dining table and pursed his lips. He’d expected the fern to be dead by this point, or in the best-case scenario, he’d be able to save it. Dean, despite expectations, had gone above and beyond.

Dean wandered into the kitchen, still in his boxers and nothing else, and padded barefoot to the refrigerator. Sam watched in disgust as Dean drank directly from the orange juice jug before placing it back into the fridge. “So what do ya want?”

Sam stared at him for a moment before replying. “I was going to see if you wanted to get some breakfast at the diner down on 5th, but I can see that you’ve been growing your own food, so maybe I can just make a salad instead.”

Dean frowned at him. “None of these are edible.”

Sam scoffed. “It was a joke. Are you going to tell me why you’ve turned your living room into a forest?”

“It's too fuckin’ early for this…” He glanced around, his eyes lingering on the plants. “I got a few more, so what?”

“A few more,” he repeated incredulously. In one step, he was in front of his brother and feeling his forehead. “Are you ok? Did something happen?”

Dean slapped Sam’s hand away and opened his mouth to argue, but the kettle started to whistle. Once the hot water and coffee grounds were in the press, he turned back to Sam. “I’m fine. Let’s just drink some coffee and go.”

Sam folded his arms across his chest stubbornly. He hadn’t become a lawyer because he was prone to giving up. “This isn’t some weird fetish, is it?”

Dean stared at him, wild-eyed. “No, bitch! I just like plants!”

“Whatever, jerk.” He grinned at Dean. “Can you blame me? You didn’t even want that fern in the first place, and now you’ve done all this? Tell me _you_ wouldn’t be suspicious.”

“They’re just plants, Sammy,” he tried to placate. “I haven’t filled the house with cocaine. Plants aren’t a gateway drug.”

Sam watched him in silence, hoping he could stare the answer out of him, but Dean just looked back stubbornly. “Fine. You just keep doing whatever you're doing with the plants.”

“Don’t say it like that.” Dean pressed the coffee and poured it into two mugs. “Sounds all wrong.”

Sam just poured himself a little creamer and kept his mouth shut. The truth would come out eventually.

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

When Dean first stumbled into Missouri’s plant nursery, it had been in a panic. Sam had _just_ dropped a plant in his hands and he had nothing to keep the thing alive. He googled the nearest nursery and set off. From what little research he had done, he knew he needed a spray bottle to mist the plants and some kind of fertilizer.

A middle-aged woman was manning the front register, checking people out and offering hellos and goodbyes as people came and went. As soon as her eyes locked on his, she stopped what she was doing and addressed him. “I’ve been waiting for you, honey. Give me a second and I’ll be right over.”

He frowned. “Uh...”

She pointed her finger at him. “You wait for me, now. Don’t go runnin off!”

Shocked and a little intimidated, he trotted off to the side with his tail between his legs so he could wait in the shade. She didn’t look like the kind of person you ignored.

A few minutes later, and halfway through a game of sudoku, he was approached. “Sorry for the wait. Let me help you out.”

“I didn’t need help,” he stammered. “I was just going to get-”

She shook her head and cut him off. “I know what you need, honey. Follow me.”

He had no choice but to follow her as she took off between the aisles. After a few minutes of silence, she arrived at her destination and gestured at the spray bottles. “Your fern is going to need misting about twice a week, and although I don’t stock any duds, this is the one I’d recommend.” She handed him the weird spray bottle and walked off. He looked back and forth between the bottle and her, before following. Had he mentioned that he had a fern? He couldn’t remember. Her next stop was the watering cans. “You’re going to tell me you don’t need one, but you do. You can’t just grab a cup out of the cupboard and use it to water your plant.” she picked up a metal can and also gave it to him. Next, was the pruning shears, then the little pouches of plant vitamins.

Five minutes later, his hands were completely full of items, and he was being led to the registers.

Wordlessly, he handed her a few twenties and pocketed his change.

“We don’t use plastic bags at my nursery, so you’ll have to carry it out on your own.”

“Alright…” he scooped everything up and contemplated exactly how he was going to be able to get all of it in his car without the use of his hands. “Well, thanks.”

“You come back in a few days and tell me how the fern is doing, alright?”

  
Arms full and more than a little confused about the whole interaction, he could do nothing but nod. Of course, he forgot all about going back, and a few days later the fern had been at death's door. It was soon after that he found Cas’ YouTube channel.

Missouri, although kind and thoughtful, was an enabler. Half the plants he owned were gifted to him by her. ‘Adoption’, Missouri called it. ‘They need a good home…’. Dean didn’t know anything about adopting plants, but he _did_ know that every time he came by, he seemed to come home with something new. Space was a hot commodity in his little apartment, but he didn’t have the heart to refuse.

Dean was at Missouri's for the third time in five days. It wasn’t a scheduled trip, and he actually had other plans for the day, but the rosemary plant he kept on his back porch had been growing like crazy and he was in the market for a new pot. He joked with Missouri that he needed to quit his job at the garage and start working there, but she always gave him a friendly swat and told him she wouldn’t hire him anyway.

Missouri smiled at him when he walked through the gates and made his way over to give her a tight hug. “Back so soon?”

He gave her shoulders a squeeze. “Need a new pot for Rosie.”

She pulled back and cupped his face with her warm, calloused hand. “I have some new ones in the back. Haven’t put them out yet, but your welcome to dig around.”

He gave her a wink and turned to head to the back. The storage building was on the other side of the lot and considering it was 85 degrees, it would be a sauna in there. He’d brave that heat for her, especially since he knew she’d have boxes in there that needed unpacking and he liked to help if he could. “Thanks! You just made my day!”

She chuckled. “I have a feeling your day is about to get much better.”

He just gave her a thumbs up and continued to the back of the nursery. If she said his day was about to get better, then it would. He’d learned weeks ago when she saved him from some moldy cheese he had unknowingly put in his sandwich, that she had a gift. Missouri and her talent were one of the reasons that he went to _this_ nursery and not the one on the other side of town. Both were equal distance, but Missouri was such a sweet woman that he wanted _her_ to have his money.

She stored most of her extra stock in a building located in the back of the lot behind a door with a ‘Staff Only’ sign. Her knees weren’t the best, so he often went in to grab things for her. In return, she threw in some extras for him. Some fertilizer here, a spray bottle there, and a plant or two that had been lonely on its shelf. He’d do it freebies or not, but her knees were one of the reasons he was there every day. If she ever got hurt and he wasn’t there, he’d place the blame fully on himself.

The building was hot and humid, but he knew that if he didn’t unbox the new merchandise, then she’d have to do it after she closed, so he went ahead and started the process. He’d tried to get her to hire some college kid to do all of the heavy lifting, but she just smiled and told him that if she did that, then he wouldn’t be coming by so often. He was glad to do it for her, though. It was in the third box that he stumbled on a glazed ceramic pot in a nice cobalt blue. It would be perfect for Rosie the rosemary, so he set it aside and quickly finished with the other two boxes. He wiped the sweat off of his forehead and stood with a groan. He was only a few feet out of the door when he heard it.

“Excuse me?”

Dean stopped walking and turned slowly. There was no way that voice belonged to who he thought it belonged to. No way. Dean was watching too much YouTube, that had to be it. Maybe he spent too much time in the storage building, and he had heatstroke. Surely he had fallen and hit his head because a hallucination was more logical than—-

Castiel was looking straight at him, his blue eyes staring up at him imploringly. Oh god… he was hotter in person. “I can't seem to find the Lady Palm, can you help me? The website led me to believe they were in stock.”

Dean stared at him, open-mouthed.

Cas shuffled his feet a bit, a little awkward in the face of Dean’s silence. “Are you out of stock, as well?”

“No!” he squeaked, his face red with embarrassment. Castiel, IFollowTheBees himself, was standing right in front of him and he needed Dean’s help. “I know where the Lady Palm. Missouri just got some in this week, actually.”

Cas seemed to sag in relief and offered him a grateful nod. “Thank you. I usually go to the nursery on the other side of town, but the owner wasn’t willing to order it for me. He says they don’t sell well.”

“That sucks.” Dean replied sympathetically and began leading him through the aisles, but inside he was screaming. He took a moment to remind himself not to be weird. There was a really good chance he could get out of the interaction not looking like an idiot as long as he just acted normal. “Missouri’s has everything.”

He looked around. “I believe it. I’ll have to start patronizing Missouri’s. She was very welcoming when I came in…”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, this place is great.”

They fell into silence for a few moments.

“I really appreciate this. I was wandering around for a while and couldn’t find anyone.”

Dean nodded in understanding. Most people don’t realize that it was just Missouri there, and no one else. “I keep telling Missouri she needs to hire someone to work the week, but she says it’s not necessary. I just do what I can.”

“Doesn’t KSU have a botany program? I’m sure there are plenty of students who would be willing to work here.”

Dean smiled at him. “Yeah. That’s what I told her.”

“Well, it’s a good thing she has you, then.”

“I think so too.” He gave Cas a wink. “I do what I can for her, but she’s stubborn.”

Dean had to stop himself a few times from blurting out something embarrassing like: ‘I watch your ‘YouTube channel’ or ‘What is your exercise routine because you’re built like a mountain.’. Instead, he just led Cas through the aisles silently, trying to figure out if it would be weird to ask for a selfie. Totally weird.

“Here they are,” Dean gestured to the group of plants. “We have a few.”

“Great.” Cas rubbed his hands together and smiled at the greenery, “I’ll take all of them.”

“All of them?” Dean asks.

Like a floodgate opened, Cas’ eyes lit up and he started talking. “I’m going to run somewhat of an experiment. Each plant will be getting different growing conditions. One will be in full sun, another will be in partial, and the last will be in my greenhouse as a control plant. I’ll be doing the same with fertilizers and watering schedules. If Missouri is willing, I’d like to order more. I expect to have interesting results in a few weeks.”

Dean frowned. “What are you going to do with all of them after the project?”

“I’ll gift them, of course.”

Dean sighed in relief. It was none of his business what people did with their plants, but he was really glad they wouldn’t be tossed. Regardless, the idea _would_ make for a cool video. “Need help to the car?”

“Would you?” he asked hopefully.

He just shrugged. “Sure. I’ll get the platform cart.”

“Thank you!” he called after Dean.

He felt Cas’s eyes on him as he walked to the cart, but when he turned around, Cas’s attention was back on the plants.”

“Let's get you set up.”

Together, they loaded all five plants onto the cart and Dean began walking him back to the front where Missouri was stationed at the register. They didn’t talk on the way, but Dean’s initial butterflies were gone enough for him to realize that Cas was just a cute plant nerd. It was sweet, really.

“Find what you need, honey?” she asked kindly as she manually inputs Cas’s items into the register. “My Dean knows what he’s doing.”

“He was very helpful.” Cas thrust out his hand. “Thank you, Dean. My name is Castiel.”

Dean smiled back at him, reaching forward to shake his hand formally. “Nice to meet you.”

Cas turned to the register and smiled at Missouri. “Your employee has been very helpful today. I wouldn’t have found these without him.”

“Oh, he’s not my employee, honey.” She told him.

With quiet feet, he tried to step away from the train wreck that was coming, but it was too late. Cas turned to him with a frown creasing the space between his eyebrows. “You don’t work here?”

Dean just shook his head. “No. I just knew where the plant was, so…”

“Dean is here almost every day. He likes to help out,” Missouri filled in. “He’s such a good boy, isn’t he?”

Cas wasn’t paying her too much attention. The mortification on his face was enough to make even Dean feel uncomfortable. “I’m so sorry, I thought you worked here. I wouldn’t have—-”

Dean cut him off before things could get worse. “I wanted to help. Don’t worry about it.”

“Still.” Cas’s face was red with embarrassment. “I even asked you to help me to my car. I’m _so_ sorry.”

Dean had to laugh. The situation was just too ridiculous. With only a second of debate, he decided things couldn’t get worse so he might as well just lay it all out. “Dude. Don’t worry about it. I offered, remember? I could have told you to fuck off anytime. I’ve seen you on YouTube, so I wanted to help.”

That seemed to stop Cas in his tracks and suddenly the man looked unsure. “Oh.”

Great. Now the guy probably thought Dean was a stalker. “I don’t want you to think I’m following you, or something. You were actually the one who got me into gardening. My brother gave me a fern and I almost killed it. You were the one who saved him.”

Cas was still squinting at him. “I don’t think you’re following me. I’m just not used to meeting viewers. My corner of YouTube is small.”

Dean smiled, loving that Cas refused to call his viewers ‘fans’ like so many other YouTubers. “I hope I didn’t make a bad impression, then.”

Cas looked away. “You didn’t.”

Dean _couldn’t_ look away. “Cool.”

He seemed to regain his bearings. “Do you have any more plants?”

Missouri cleared her throat and told him his total. He gave her his card and brought his attention back to Dean.

“Yeah. Tons more.”

Cas’s small smile turned into a full grin. “I’m honored.”

Dean smiled back. “You still want help loading your car?”

Cas looked away shyly. “I should probably get help from an employee.”

Dean laughed. “Well, you’re out of luck. It’s just Missouri.”

“Oh, yes…you mentioned that.” Cas looked towards the parking lot in thought. “In that case, I’ll accept your offer. Thank you, Dean.”

He walked with Cas to the car, a 2002 Tacoma, and helped load the plants into the truck bed.

“Thank you, Dean. I really appreciate all of your help.”

“Your welcome,” He replied.

They stared at each other for a few more moments before Cas cleared his throat and awkwardly waved goodbye.

Dean only realized that he forgot to buy the new pot when he got home.

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

As usual, the first thing Dean did when he got home from work on Friday, was to take a shower. Washing off the dirt and oil was the one part of his nightly routine that made him feel human again. The second was to pull out a container full of leftover chili and warm it for dinner. The third (and most important) was to turn on his TV and load Cas’s live stream.

It started out as usual.

Cas smiling face and a serious: “Hello everyone. I’d like to thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule and—”

“Blah, blah, blah,” Gabe’s voice interrupted from behind the camera. “They know the drill. Let's get to the questions.”

Cas let out a sigh and rolled his eyes at his brother. “I apologize. Gabe is—-”

“They love me,” Gabe interrupted again.

Cas just stared into the camera, his expression pained, and Dean burst into laughter. It was like a scene out of the office. Grinning at the video, Dean settled in for the 49-minute stream.

“First question! XOMiraMara says ‘Hey, plant daddy! Ever think of doing a meetup?’”

Cas rolled his eyes at the nickname but answered anyway. “I don’t have any plans to, but I appreciate your willingness to meet me.”

“Next is Ladytenor98. She asks if eating honey is good for bees.”

Cas perked up. “That is a great question, Ladytenor. Wild bee populations are very low, and because of this, we rely on domesticated bees to pollinate most of our produce. We rely on bees for almonds, berries, beans, cucumbers, sweet potatoes, pumpkins and many more. So, by supporting the beekeeping industry, you are also supporting the growth of these foods. Beekeepers can move hives from place to place so that there is always a source of food for the bees, while wild bees are stuck in one place, often causing them to die when the food supply has dried up. If you—” he cut himself off with a shy smile. “Sorry about that. I got a little carried away.”

Dean smiled at Cas’s passionate rant. It was exactly that kind of content he loved the most. It reminded him of when he’d bumped into the guy at the plant nursery and he’d started going on about his upcoming experiment. The memory made Dean a little hot in the collar, and he cleared the thickness out of his throat before continuing the video.

“Next is Gabriel: the sexiest man in the room!”

Dean snorted. It was impossible that someone as annoying as Gabe could be better looking than Cas.

Cas glared at him. “I’m not taking questions from you.”

Gabe snickered. “Come on, bro. I just have one question.”

“One question,” Cas agreed firmly. “But it can’t involve me removing clothing.”

Gabe gasped loudly. “I would _never._”

“You did,” Cas reminded him. “Stop goading me.”

“Fine.” Dean could hear the grin in his voice. “Why don’t you talk about that plant guy? What was his name? The one you met at the nursery?” Dean squinted at the camera. “Oh yeah! His name was D-”

“Gabe!” he shouted, yelling over the name Gabe was just about to say. “That’s not a question! Next, please.”

“Oh come on, Cassie.” Gabe pleaded. “Everyone wants to know.”

“Gabe…” he warned again.

The camera shook and fingers appeared on screen for a moment before the camera was turned to a short man with floppy brown hair. From the grin on his face, it was clear that it was Gabriel in the flesh, a fact that he confirmed seconds later. “I know what you’re thinking… wow, what a sexy beast. Yes, I _did _get all of the looks in the family. There was a reason I’m named after an angel.” He ran his hand through his hair and gave the camera a wink. “Don’t be too hard on Cassie, he tries his best.”

“Gabe,” Cas growled but was ignored.

“I need to give the audience a big announcement. Can I have a drumroll, please?” Cas folded his arms and glared in protest. “Our Cassie is in love!”

“I’m going to kill you.”

“L is for the way you look at me!” he sang off-tune, spinning in a wide circle as if dancing. “O is for-”

There was a scuffle in which the camera was yanked around and finally returned to Gabriel's hand. “Wow. Never thought you’d see that side of Cassie, did you? He’s quick for such a big guy, isn’t he?”

“I know where you sleep.”

“Maybe the song was a bit much.” He conceded. “But let me tell you, my plant children, your daddy is in love!”

“I’m not in love,” Cas insisted. “I only met Dean once!”

Dean froze in place, a spoonful of chili halfway to his mouth. “What the fuck…”

“Dean!” Gabriel cried out dreamily. “What a strong name. Tell us about this gentleman, Cassie. I heard he was your knight in shining armor.”

“Oh my god.” Dean dropped his spoon and turned up the volume. Gabe had said ‘plant nursery’ and ‘Dean.’. “He can’t mean…”

Gabriel flopped onto the couch next to Cas and looped his free hand around his brother’s shoulders. “Spill the tea.”

“Don’t ever say that again.”

Dean glanced at the chat replay, but it was moving too fast for him to make out more than a few words. He turned to Robbie and rubbed the delicate leaves through his fingers. “He said Dean, right? You heard it too?”

“So, Dean…” Gabe repeated, confirming Dean’s question. “Tell us about him.”

“He was just a nice man who helped me with some new plants.”

“Tell me more! Tell me more!” Gabe sang to the tune of “Summer Nights.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “He didn’t work there, he just wanted to help.”

“Was he cute?”

Cas just blushed. “Next question.”

Gabriel zoomed in on his own face. “Oh, Gabe… his eyes were so green! His freckles were so cute! His muscles were so big and his ass was—-”

“I didn’t say that!”

“Come one, Cassie!”

“If I talk about it can we move on?”

Grinning like the Cheshire cat, Gabriel agrees. “So… what did he look like.”

Cas blushed. “He had brown hair, and green eyes—-”

“And freckles!” Gabe added.

Cas closed his eyes and appeared to die a little inside. “Yes. He had freckles.”

“And what about his ass?”

“I wasn’t looking at his ass,” Cas argued. “Dean, if you’re watching this, I’m very sorry.”

“And he’s a viewer!” Gabe cackled in glee. “You didn’t tell me _that_! Did our plant daddy fall in love with a fan?”

“I’m done.” Cas stood to leave.

Gabe grabbed his arm and yanked him back to the couch. “Wait! I’m not done yet!”

“What more could you possibly—-”

“Dean,” Gabe said loudly. “If you’re watching this, DM me. I’ll hook you up.”

Cas groaned loudly and hid his face with his hands. Dean felt so bad for the guy that he paused the video rather than watch him suffer.

Dean put his laptop aside and stood to pace his bedroom. Cas had thought he was cute… had _liked_ him. A laugh bubbled out of his chest. There was no way that had just happened. He must have slipped in the shower and hit his head. There was no way someone as adorable as Cas would like him. All he’d done was help the guy find a plant. That was it.

He sat back on his bed and rewound the video so he could watch it from the start. Nothing changed. Cas had all but admitted to liking him, and Gabe had even offered to hook them up. Dean powered down his laptop and got up to rewarm his chili. Once that was done, Dean pulled out his phone and opened his Instagram. Gabe had told him to send a DM, hadn’t he? What would it hurt? Worst case scenario, Cas would say he wasn’t interested and he’d probably never see him again. He _had_ lasted 34 years without bumping into the guy, so he’d be fine. Best case scenario? They’d meet for coffee and hit it off.

He decided to go for it.

To: IFollowTheBees

_Hey. This is Dean. If Cas wants, I could take him out for coffee. I know you run the Instagram, so let me know what he says._

_-Dean_

He sent it without thinking too hard about it all and then went to get ready for bed. By the time he brushed his teeth and changed into clean boxers, he noticed he had a reply.

To: Ramblinman

_How do I know it’s you?_

Dean frowned and started typing.

To: IFollowTheBees

_I don’t know. Ask me a question or something_

Just as soon as the ‘seen’ appeared below his message, a reply appeared.

To: Ramblinman

_What was Cassie buying?_

Dean smirked. Jackpot.

To: IFollowTheBees

_He bought 5 lady palm_

To: Ramblinman

_You, my friend, are the winner of a date with Cassie. Can I film it for the channel?_

To: IFollowTheBees

_No._

To: Ramblinman

_You’re no fun…_

Dean turned off his phone without replying.

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

He looked at his phone for the fifth time that morning and sighed to himself. Gabe told him to meet Cas at Classic Coffee at 11:30 am, and he was early. Very early. There might have been a small chance that he was in a panic, and had left an hour early so that he could get them the perfect table and decide what drink he was getting so he didn’t look like a complete idiot. The iced french toast latte was calling out to him, but he didn’t want to give the wrong impression, so he fully prepared to order his coffee black and suck it up. Sam would call it toxic masculinity, but he could shut the fuck up.

At t- minus 10 minutes to showtime, Dean got a notification from Instagram. Opening it, he saw that it was a message from IFollowTheBees.

To: Ramblinman

_Cassie is on his way!_

Dean didn’t know what it was, but he had the sinking suspicion that something wasn’t right. Maybe it was the fact that Cas hadn’t once talked to Dean himself, or maybe it was the fact that Gabe seemed so willing to set them up on a date despite not knowing one thing about Dean. Either way, the whole situation was a little too strange.

To: IFollowTheBees

_Castiel knows he’s meeting me, right?_

Gabe left him on seen, and Dean’s heart plummeted. He didn’t know too much about Gabe, but he could tell a lot from the interaction he’d seen in the live stream. Like Dean, Gabe seemed the type to play a prank — a prank like not letting his brother know he was getting set up on a date.

He debated leaving, but it was the minuscule chance that he was wrong… that Cas _did_, in fact, know he was meeting Dean for a coffee date, that made him want to stay.

At almost 11:30 on the dot, Cas walked into Classic Coffee. Without sparing a look to the people around him, he got in line and ordered an iced maple chai with oat milk. Dean watched him walk to the pick-up counter and wait patiently, still not looking around as someone would do if they were meeting a date. With a groan, he realized that he had, in fact, been set up on a date with a man who had no idea what was coming.

Dean stood up and stared at the man. He had two clear options. One, he could walk out of the coffee shop and not look back. Or two, he could stay and try to get the guy to agree to the date. Both options were looking pretty shitty at the moment. Thinking about it a bit more, Dean realized it would be so easy to walk up to him and offer a ‘Hello! Fancy seeing you here. Join me for coffee?’. Even if that worked, and Cas agreed to go on an impromptu date with him, the first thing Gabe would do when he saw Cas would be to ask him how his date went. Even if it was the best impromptu date in the world, Cas would probably not forgive him for being dishonest.

Deciding to just suck it up and tell the truth, he approached Cas as the man waited for his chai.

“Hey, Cas.”

Cas jumped, clearly not expecting to be addressed, and turned to Dean. “Oh, hello Dean.”

Dean just smiled at the deer in the headlights look he was getting. “How ya doing?”

Cas was resolutely looking everywhere but at Dean. “I’m doing quite well, thank you. Yourself?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, I’m alright. I was about to order some coffee. Can I join you?”

This caused Cas to finally look at him. “Yes, of course.”

Dean smiled and walked up to order his coffee. Emboldened by Cas’s own sugary choice, Dean decided to say fuck it and order the french toast monstrosity. He walked over to the table Cas had found and sat down while he waited for his coffee to be made. Cas, still resolutely not looking at him, took a sip of his steaming chai and sighed.

“Never had chai before,” Dean commented, trying to get some conversation out of the man before he made things awkward by letting the guy know that he had unwillingly been set up on a date. “Is it good?”

Cas placed the cup down softly and linked his fingers together in his lap. “Yes. It is. I drink coffee, but I prefer teas.”

Dean grinned. “Can’t stand teas. My mom used to have a whole drawer in the kitchen for them, but I could never get into it.”

“Maybe you didn’t try the right kind.”

“Maybe,” he conceded, sure that he’d probably try whatever Cas put in front of him. “So…” Cas met his eyes and waited for Dean to continue. “I watched the live stream.”

Immediately, a flush worked its way to Cas’s cheeks. “Oh.”

“Yeah. It was…” Dean trailed off. Enlightening? Hilariously awkward?

Cas gripped his cup tightly. “I’m so sorry about that. Gabe was being difficult, and I, well…”

He reached out and put his hand on Cas’s forearm, stopping him from accidentally popping the top off of his to-go cup with his death grip. “It's fine. It was… a good show.”

“Oh?” he asked, still flushed with embarrassment, but now genuinely curious. “You liked it?”

“Yeah.” He confirmed. “I actually sent Gabe a message.”

This seemed to confuse him. “About what?”

Dean shifted awkwardly in his seat. “He said to send a DM if I was interested.”

Eyebrows nearly touching his hairline, he stared at Dean in shock. “You were interested?”

Not willing to look Cas in the eyes when he said this next part, he took a big sip of the cold liquid. “Well, yeah. I messaged him and after I proved I was actually Dean, he told me you’d go on a date with me. Here. Right now.”

Cas squinted. “Oh.”

“Oh?”

“So you didn’t just bump into me. You were here expecting a date.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yeah…” he said slowly.

“Well.” Cas took another sip of his tea. “I suppose all that left is to wonder if we are on a date right now.”

“You’re not gonna say anything about your brother setting you up on a date and then not telling you?”

Cas let out a huff of laughter. It’ was the first time Dean saw him smile in person, and it was even better than the videos. “I’m not surprised in the slightest. This is exactly the kind of thing Gabe would do. He’s set me up on dates before, it just so happens that I like you, so I’m more than willing to play along.”

Dean could feel his face heating up. Who just said shit like that? “Well then,” he began with as much bravado as he could muster, “I guess we’re on a date, then.”

They smiled at each other and took a sip of their drinks.

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

**One month later…**

**o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

Sam Winchester didn’t often watch YouTube videos. He preferred to read a book or listen to podcasts. It also wasn’t often that Dean shared a video on Facebook. Naturally, he had to watch it.

He was redirected to YouTube and skipped the ads before settling in for the 11-minute video.

After a short intro, the camera zoomed out just as a dark-haired man walked into the frame. “Hello, everyone. Welcome to my garden.”

Sam rolled his eyes and huffed. Of course Dean was trying to recruit people into his new hobby. He was probably realizing that having so many plants was a lady repeller, and he needed to recruit more people to the lifestyle. It would serve him right, Sam thought. He’d tried to get Dean to hang out with him, but he’d been too busy for his little brother over the last few weeks. He’d all but dropped off the face of the earth.

He considered exiting out of the video but changed his mind. Dean would have shared it for a reason, and if it was lame he’d be able to use it as fuel for the next time Dean gave him shit about something.

The man was still talking, this time about his newest project. “—lady palm that I have been running experiments with. I’ve purchased 10 in total, and have been running multiple experiments involving every aspect of gardening. As you can see, they are being brought out right now, so we can see the results.

Looking off to the side, Sam could clearly see a shirtless man dragging large pots of lady palm into the backyard. He was fit and sweaty, obviously working hard in the heat. Getting a sense of familiarity, he switched the video to full screen and squinted at the man. Despite video quality being on its highest setting, and despite the larger view, Sam still couldn’t make out why he thought the guy looked so familiar. It was strange, after all, to be able to recognize someone from the sight of a naked back. He shook his head at himself and leaned back in the chair.

It seemed like Dean really _did_ just share a random plant video. Sam smiled in delight. He'd have fuel for _days._ Suddenly, the man he had been staring at for so long, stood to full height and arched his back. Once the man was satisfied with his stretch, he turned towards the camera briefly before walking out of shot.

Sam let the video play for a few more seconds before he froze. The feeling of familiarity was back with a vengeance. That almost looked like…

He backtracked a few seconds and let the scene play through once again. Holy shit, it was Dean. Sam paused the video right at the second his brother turned to face the camera. He was maybe thirty feet behind the dark-haired man, and he was slightly out of focus, but it was Dean. Clear as day.

“What the fuck?”

He expanded the video description, but nothing mentioned his brother. Desperately, he went into the comments and was met with a barrage of information.

_CharChar:_

_Eeeeek! Is that the boyfriend! Have him on!_

_LivingDrea42:_

_IS THAT THE DEAN!_

_Jojo4891_

_I can’t believe you’d tease us like that! RUDE!_

_ConfusedAndDazed_

_When is your boyfriend going to be on the live stream_

_Meganrem_

_What did I miss? Whos Dean? I’m gone for 2 weeks, and I miss daddy getting a boyfriend!???_

_DynamiteDaily_

_The boyfriend needs a nickname! Plant Papa? Father foliage? So many options_

Sam stared at the computer in awe. Just _what_ was going on? With a bit of trepidation, he scrolled through the video, but Dean didn’t seem to reappear. He opened the man's channel and clicked on a newer video. Not paying any attention to the title or content, he hovered over the loading bar and searched frame by frame for any images of his brother. Just as the video was about to end, he spotted him. Dean was walking behind the man as he filmed, nonchalantly carrying a watering can and paying no attention to the camera.

The comments in this one were just like the other

_‘Stop teasing us!’_

_‘Have him on the next Q&A!”_

_‘Can we have Dean in a video!’_

_‘Dean spotted at 7:34’_

_‘EEEeeEkkkkkkkKKkk! IT’S THE DEAN!”_

And oddly enough, more than one comment was quoting L.O.V.E. by Frank Sinatra.

Another one, this one the newest, was searched through, and halfway through, he caught sight of his brother. IFollowTheBees was seated on his couch, going on about a tomato recipe, when it happened. From the side of the frame, Dean’s freckled arm made an appearance followed by his face. Cas paused his dialogue and smiled at him fondly before taking the mug of tea he was being offered. With a smirk and a wink to the camera, Dean leaned in and kissed the man on the cheek before disappearing once again.

Sam subscribed and called his brother.


End file.
